Being busy wasn’t enough for me, I wanted everyone else to know as well. I’d tell anyone who would listen how I had it so tough, travelling for work, juggling family, friends, social life, gym sessions, rushing around to get the food shopping, presents for birthdays, the list goes on.
It made me feel better to let people know how hard my life was… But not anymore.
Busyness is just an illusion that makes everything harder than it has to be. I started to think in a different way and guess what… I got different results!
Being busy for the sake of being busy
If you have enough money to live off and you are not struggling to put food on the table, why juggle three jobs? Aren’t you just inflicting busyness onto yourself? I am not saying that you would not do everything in your power to provide for your family but do you really need that holiday to Mexico when you can have just as good a time in Spain? I’m just too busy! How often do you use that phrase in a day? Once, twice, fifty, one hundred times? Come on, be honest, we all use it as an excuse.
Running a business is hard, I am constantly working at the moment, however, I only got a hold on my busyness when I realised that it was in my control… I have the power to say NO!
Honestly, the majority of the time I actually created hurry and worry when it didn’t really exist. On a normal day you would find me running around, trying to fit everything in, road raging when stuck in traffic and shouting at people, including the people I love to move faster.
- “Hurry up and finish your breakfast, we are going to be late for school”
- “Get out of the way, I am going to miss my meeting”
- “I need this done in the next hour or we won’t meet out targets”
I cringe when I think about it now!
The funny thing is, whether I moaned at everyone around me to move faster or not, we always moved at about the same pace anyway. The only difference was, when I did moan, everyone including myself, was unhappier.
It became crystal clear to me that nearly all of my busyness was an overreaction in my head. Instead of creating urgency in others, and somehow make my life easier, instead, what I actually did was the exact opposite. My busyness only created anxiety, bitterness and resentment. And even on days when the busyness was real, it was typically due to an overbooked schedule that I had personally created.
Something had to change, and fast.
Why in the world was I voluntarily making my own life harder, busier and unhappier than it had to be?
This got me thinking. I realised that one of the main reasons for being constantly busy (apart from me allowing it) is the society we now live in. Honestly, how many times do you check your phone each day? I bet you are always connected, always sharing, always comparing.
We have become the kind of society that defines who we are based on where we live, what car we drive, what clothes we wear, what we have in relation to everyone else. If we are not on par with our friends, family, who we follow on Instagram etc, we feel inferior and often like a failure. The only way we can possibly do better is by being busier, working harder etc… after all, we are what we post, right? WRONG…
Anyone can build a glamorous life on social media, always photographed having fun, at parties, with friends, the list goes on, but with any manufactured busyness, we forget who we actually are and what we stand for, our busyness has buried it with worry, hurry and the endless need to be doing something else, just to look like we are having a life, without actually having one.
Enough moaning now!